Wonderful Wife: “Look at this summer camp. I went ahead and signed him up. It looks amazing.”

Me: “Wow. That does look amazing. I never got to do camps like that.”

Little Miss Thing, age 7: “Let’s get Daddy a camp. He seems jealous.”

Me: “I’m totally jealous. But let’s make sure we can afford your camps first. How much was that camp exactly?”

WW: “Oh, it can’t be that much.”

(reads website more closely)

WW: (suspicious silence)

Me: “Seriously. How much?”

WW: “I’m not saying.”

Me: …

WW: “Think of the memories they’ll be making.”

Me: “And we can remember when we used to have money.”