Branding

I just branded myself with a 350-degree piece of metal.

It was a cookie sheet, right across my belly.

I gotta tell ya… ‘baking topless’ sounded more sexy than it really was.

#DontJudgeMe

Open up a little

Anyone who says money can’t buy happiness has never been to a wedding reception with an open bar.

Little Miss Thing has announced three nights in a row that she doesn’t want to have “a big belly like Daddy” when she grows up.

In other news, I started a new diet today. Sigh.