Written All Over Me

(rural liquor store)

Clerk: “You heading into Indy?”

Me: “Why yes, I am.”

Clerk: “You heading to Gen Con?”

Me: “Actually… yes! How perceptive of you. Do I just have that look? I mean, I know sometimes people say I look like a viking, and I really enjoy…”

Clerk: “You’re wearing a shirt that says Gen Con.”

Me: (looks down at shirt)

Me: “Oh. Right.”

(long pause)

Clerk: “Have fun storming the castle.”

Me: “Thanks.”

(walks out)

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Adorable

(at Gen Con)

Geeky Woman: “You are so adorable!”

Me: “Me?” (looks at boyfriend, he shrugs)

GW: “Yeah. You’re so fuzzy.”

Me: (keeps walking) “Thank you.”

GW: “I saw you earlier and wanted to tell you.”

Me: “Well, I don’t get called adorable very often.” (is she following me?)

GW: “What can I say? I just love dwarves!”

Me: “Yeah, I usually get Viking. But I guess Dwarf…”

GW: “Do you ever braid your beard? I always just want to braid long beards.”

Me: “Yeah, a couple times I’ve…”

GW: “I love it! Do you ever braid your hair and put those metal things in it?”

Me: “No, but I’d like to try…”

GW: “That’s awesome! You are awesome.”

Me: “Uhh…thank you.”

GW: “Have a great Gen Con.”

Me: “I will. You, too.” (keeps walking)

Passing Teen: “It’s a Patrick Rothfuss theme this year.”

Second Passing Teen: “Who is Patrick Rothfuss?”

PT1: “You know him. He’s that author with a big bushy beard that looks like… well, it looks like that dude’s beard.”

PT2: “Oh, yeah, I know who you mean.”

Me: “Glad to help.” (keeps walking)