Tag: Make Good Choices

Montgomery Biscuits

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Me: “So, we’ll be in Montgomery around dinner time. Surely there’s somewhere fun and local we can eat?”

Wonderful Wife: “Hmm… this app shows what’s along our route. It looks like all chain restaurants. Oh, wait, this sounds great. What do you think of trying The Montgomery Biscuits?”

Me: “Uh, yeah! That sounds exactly like the type of awesome Southern food I was hoping to find! ”

WW: “Oh, and they even scored a 4.8 out of 5.0.”

Me: “WOW! We are totally eating there! Wait… better check their hours. They may close early on Sundays.”

WW: “Good idea. I’m Googling it right now… and…”

(hysterical laughter)

Me: “Are you OK, Honey? What’s wrong?”

WW: “We might want to keep looking. The Montgomery Biscuits is the minor league baseball team.”

Me: (slow blink)

Camping with Bucks

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Wonderful Wife: “Look at this summer camp. I went ahead and signed him up. It looks amazing.”

Me: “Wow. That does look amazing. I never got to do camps like that.”

Little Miss Thing, age 7: “Let’s get Daddy a camp. He seems jealous.”

Me: “I’m totally jealous. But let’s make sure we can afford your camps first. How much was that camp exactly?”

WW: “Oh, it can’t be that much.”

(reads website more closely)

WW: (suspicious silence)

Me: “Seriously. How much?”

WW: “I’m not saying.”

Me: …

WW: “Think of the memories they’ll be making.”

Me: “And we can remember when we used to have money.”

Dip Dares

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Danger Monkey, age 10: “Mom, you can have my extra Fun Dip.”

Wonderful Wife: “Well, thank you!”

DM: “OK, I’ll tell you how to eat it. It’s a different kind of candy.”

WW: “Oh, honey. I know how to eat Fun Dip. Trust me.”

Me: “Yeah, kiddo. Fun Dip was around even when we were kids.”

WW: “In fact, in high school, I once poured three packets of Fun Dip on a pickle and ate it.”

Me: “Whut.”

DM: “Ewwww! Why?”

WW: “It was a dare. It was absolutely disgusting. Ask Alex Service. I cannot recommend the combo.”

Me: “Son, don’t ever do something on a dare. It never works out.”

DM: “OK. But I want to try Fun Dip on a pickle.”

Me: …

Me: “I don’t feel like I’m getting through to you here.”