Good Choices

My Oldest, age 14: “And where are you two going tonight on your date?”

Me: “A party.”

Oldest: “Will there be alcohol?”

Me: “Yes.”

Oldest: “Have you made arrangements for a designated driver?”

Me: “Wait… Which one of us is the parent here? This is like good cop / bad cop or something.”

Oldest: “You seem to be avoiding that last question.”

Me: (pause) “Yes, I will not drink so I can drive us home.”

Oldest: “Good. You may leave now.”

Never put on the necklace

My favorite part of our kids gaming party: the older boys playing Pathfinder in the back room. I overhear little snippets of their game that immediately take me back to fifth grade.

DM: “You find a necklace with an oversized, clear gem. Magic swirls inside the stone. Do you put it on?”

It took all my strength to not yell, “Never put on the necklace!!!”

UPDATE: For all those of you who asked, yes, he put on the necklace and it tried to strangle him. I repeat… never put on a necklace you find in a dungeon!