Time (f)lies

Little Miss Thing, age 6: “We haven’t be to Jiffy Treet in over a year. I keep track.”

Me: “I don’t think it’s been a year. How do you keep track?”

LMT: “I have a big sheet of paper.”

Me: “Can I see it?”

LMT: (pause) “OK, I don’t track it. But it does SEEM like a year.”



Me: “What did you do at camp today?”

Little Miss Thing, age 5: “We made ice cream.”

Me: “Very cool. How did you make it? With cream and sugar?”

LMT: “No, I made it with… a door knob… and a crushed up car… and an old stop sign… and chocolate syrup.”

Me: “Wow… I didn’t know that’s how ice cream was made. Did you stir it?”

LMT: “No. I put gas on it and lit a match and it went BOOM!”

Me: “I had no idea it worked like that.”

LMT: “It’s Chemistry.”

I Scream

Me: “Kids, your mother and I are going out for dinner and a movie.”

Little Miss Thing, age 5: “I’ll be in charge while you’re gone.”

Danger Monkey, age 8: “Hey! Why do you get to be in charge?”

LMT: “Because if I’m in charge, everyone gets to eat ice cream.”

DM: “OK, you can be in charge.”

Me: “You show solid leadership skills kiddo, but actually Grandpa will be in charge.”

LMT (loud whisper): “We still get ice cream.”