You are the Weiner

Little Miss Thing, age 7: “Why are they called hamburgers? They aren’t made of ham.”

Me: “I believe they’re named after Hamburg, Germany.”

LMT: “Check it on Wikipedia.”

Danger Monkey, age 10: “Wikipedia is not always correct. Be sure to verify the sources.”

Me: “Yes, says here the name comes from Hamburg. Also, frankfurters are named after Frankfurt.”

DM: “Huh? What’s a frankfurter?”

Me: “Thats an old-fashioned name for hot dogs. Also, the word ‘weiner’ comes from the German pronunciation of Vienna. Have you guys ever heard of weiners?”

(so much giggling)

Me: “I guess I walked right into that one.”


Ham It Up

Me: “How is your turkey sandwich?”

Danger Monkey, age 9: “It’s OK, I guess.”

Me: “Yeah, between you and me, turkey is kind of dull. What could we put on there to make it better? Maybe mayonnaise? Avacado? Sliced tomatoes?”

DM: “How about ham… and bacon!”

Me: (pause) “You make me so proud, son.”