(I arrive home) My Oldest, age 16: “Where’ve you been? I made popcorn, no help from you. You can’t have any. Don’t even ask.” Me: “Why would I want popcorn? I just got Chinese takeout, thank you very much.” Oldest: “Ooooh, Chinese! Gimme some.” (long pause) Me: “Do you even hear the irony?”
You gotta try Great Taste Buffet. Much higher quality food than most mid-size buffets, and the deep fried pork chops are AMAZING. Also, I am currently the third largest guy eating here right now, so… clearly they have the Big Man vote of confidence. — at Great Taste Buffet.
It is a well established historical fact that Vikings have always loved Chinese food. Since the beginning of their history, these fierce warriors have been known to indulge in the fare every chance the get, with a particular focus on General Tso’s Chicken, potstickers, and those chicken-on-a-stick things.
In 1844, a team of scientists from the British Museum found and transcribed a large number of ancient runic documents found at a Viking picnicking location very near Stonehenge. Most of the papers found in the archeological dig turned out to be bad viking love poetry, roughly scrawled “to pillage” lists, and napkins smeared with soy sauce. However, the discovery of crude lists of Chinese meal descriptions and corresponding prices was the first of its kind. It also finally confirmed that Vikings had invented the earliest form of Chinese take-out.
[For historical accuracy, the Editor would like to mention that the Chinese didn’t care much care for the early model of Viking “take-out”, and are much happier with the more modern interpretation.]
While certainly not historical “fact,” to this day many people believe that it is very stealthy Vikings that slip those carry-out menus under your door when you’re not home.