Me: “Hey, wanna go out for dinner tonight?”
Wonderful Wife: “I really don’t feel well. I have a horrible headache and the lymph nodes in my neck are swollen.”
Me: (typing on my phone)
Me: “I looked up your symptoms. I’m afraid you only have a few hours to live.”
WW: (heads into kitchen)
Me: “What are you doing?”
WW: “Making pop tarts and chocolate Quik. If I’m dying, that’s how I want to go out.”
Danger Monkey, age 10: “What are you doing?”
Me: “I’m making a dry rub.”
DM: “What’s that?”
Me: “It’s a yummy mix of brown sugar and some spices that I’ll be literally rubbing onto a rack of ribs here in a couple minutes.”
DM: “Whoa, ribs for dinner! Cool!”
Me: “Wanna help make the ribs? I’ll teach you everything I know.”
DM: “Nah, but I’ll help eat it. I already know how how to do that.”
Me: “Did you enjoy the gaming convention last weekend?”
Little Miss Thing, age 7: “Yes! I love gaming conventions!”
Me: “Really? Aw, that’s awesome. That makes your geeky Dad’s heart just melt with happiness! What was your favorite part?”
LMT: “All the pancakes.”
Very Vocal Viking 