Me: “Listen to this sick beat.” (drumming on the steering wheel)
Danger Monkey, age 9: “Keep your hands firmly on the wheel at 10 and 2.”
Me: “Who are you, my mother?”
DM: “No, I just want you to not kill us.”
Me: “OK that’s valid. A little judgey, but valid.”
Little Miss Thing, age 6: “Daddy, bring me a plate.”
Me: “I think you need to find a better way to ask than that.”
LMT: “Plates don’t have legs – it isn’t going to walk out here by itself!”
Me: “Try again.”
LMT: “Please bring me a plate?”
Me: “There you go.”
Me: “It’s time to go. You were given plenty of warning. Is your room clean?”
Little Miss Thing, age 6: “Yes.”
Me: “Really? You can’t go with me unless your room is truly clean.”
LMT: “It is.”
Me: “For your info, I’m going go check for myself.”
LMT: “Give me a minute.” (Runs upstairs and starts cleaning furiously)
Very Vocal Viking 