Wonderful Wife: “You need to be totally ready for the bus in five minutes. You don’t want to miss the bus on the first day of school.”
Little Miss Thing, age 7: “But, I AM totally ready.”
WW: “No, you’re not. Now go finish getting ready.”
LMT: “I AM READY!”
(long pause)
WW: “I recommend shoes and socks.”
LMT: (looks at bare feet)
LMT: “Oh, yeah.”
(runs off)
Little Miss Thing, age 7: “When does school start again?”
Me: “A few weeks. Not long now.”
LMT: “Good!”
Me: “Good? Are you getting excited about starting up 3rd grade? It’s a very important time in your…”
LMT: “No, I’m excited about back to school shopping!”
Me: …
(school office 9:00 am)
Little Miss Thing, age 7: “You have to fill out a tardy slip for me.”
Me: “OK, I seem to remember that from last time.”
LMT: “You should check ‘Overslept’ for the reason.”
Me: “Sure.”
LMT: (loudly) “He overslept, not me. I was ready and made my own breakfast.”
School Secretary: “Good for you, kiddo.”
LMT: “I had to wake him up. I think he’s sick.”
Me: “She doesn’t need all the ugly details.”
School Secretary: “I’ve heard a lot worse than that.”
Me: “I bet you have.”
Very Vocal Viking 