I’ve reached that phase of fatherhood where I feel I’m half man, half ATM.
Danger Monkey, age 8: “I want to earn money while I sleep.”
Me: “Uh… OK. How do you plan to do that?”
DM: “Write a book and get it published and collect the money.”
Me: (Heart swells with pride)
Little Miss Thing, age 5: “Or you could learn to sleep walk and take money out of the bank.”
Me: (Glaring) “I’m watching you, sister.”
SWEET! Our money problems are all solved! I was just notified that a relative has left me in their will! And I didn’t even know I had relatives in Togo? I really should keep track of these things more closely. Oh, well! Doesn’t matter now. Just a few pesky bank details to share and we’ll be set!