Catch my drift

Me: “You know, honey, having the same BFF for the last five years is nice, but keep in mind that you and she will probably drift apart someday.”

My Oldest Girl, age 13: “Oh, it won’t be a drift. There will be a boy involved, and it will involve knives and restraining orders.”

“Epic.”

Having 2 ten year old girls in the car gives me the opportunity to overhear some very interesting conversations.

Girl1: “OK, you have 10 seconds to answer… If I died right now, what would you do?”

Girl2: “Of what?”

Girl1: “Huh?”

Girl2: “What did you die of?”

Girl1: “Nothing. I just fell over dead.”

Girl2: “I’d call 911 and then kick your dead body off of my foot.”

Girl1: “What? You hate me?”

Girl2: “No, but I don’t want a corpse on my foot. If you died right now, the way you’re sitting there, you’d totally slump over onto my foot.”

Girl1: “Oh. So, it’s not personal?”

Girl2: “Of course not! You’re my BFF!”

Girl1 & 2: SQUEEEEE

Girl1: “Epic.”

Girl2: “So Epic.”