My Oldest, age 16: (singing)
Danger Monkey, age 10: “That song’s annoying. Stop singing.”
MO: (sings louder)
DM: “OK, then you lose 10 points.”
MO: “What points?”
DM: “You just lost 10 points for your House.”
MO: “I don’t care.”
DM: “Minus 10 more points for not caring.”
MO: (rolls eyes)
Me: “You know, Son, we’re all in the same house. Taking away points from your family members doesn’t really make much sense.”
DM: (long pause)
DM: “Minus 10 points for Dad.”
Me: “OK, kids. Lets have a little learning experience. I’ll give you a choice. We can all get milkshakes here at the restaurant and pay $20, or we can buy two big things of ice cream at a grocery store on the way home for $10 and eat ice cream every night all week.”
Danger Monkey, age 10: “I vote for milkshakes here.”
Me: “Really? You’re usually the one who prefers getting a bargain.”
DM: “It’s not a bargain when I think you’ll eat all the ice cream at home.”
Me: (glaring)
My Oldest, age 16: “So, Dad, how are you enjoying your learning experience?”
Me: (glaring intensifies)
(loud crash upstairs)
Me: “What was that giant crashing noise?!?”
(long pause)
Little Miss Thing, age 7, down the stairs: “I’m OK.”
Me: “What happened?”
(long pause)
LMT: “Turns out I can’t fly.”
Very Vocal Viking 