Author: VeryVocalViking

Just your friendly neighborhood giant viking, with a lot to say about food, family life, geek culture, and the world at large.

Chips on My Shoulder

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My Oldest, age 16: (walks in eating potato chips) “Hey, since when do you hide potato chips from us?”

Me: “SHHHHH!”

Me: (whispering) “I don’t hide them. I just… store them… strategically. And please be quiet before the others hear you.”

My Oldest: “This from the guy who tells us to not keep secrets. Nice.”

Me: “Hey, now. I only hide them because you kids snarf them up immediately as soon as you know they’re in the house. It’s one of my only treats, so I like to have some stick around in the house longer than 10 minutes.”

My Oldest: “Whatever. You can hide all the BBQ chips you want, I just want the plain ones.”

Danger Monkey, age 10: (from the other room) “We have BBQ chips! Woo-hoo!”

Me: (glaring)

My Oldest: (batting eye lashes) “Love you, Daddy.” (walks away)

 

Size Matters

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Me: “Good morning. Is this where you sell convention t-shirts, here at the registration desk?”

Nice Registration Lady: “Yes it is! Would you like one?”

Me: “Yes, please. I’d like to buy a 5XL, or as I like to call it — Viking Medium.”

NRL: “So then what’s 4XL called –Delicate Little Flower?”

Me: “I like that. I like that a lot. You’d make a Badass Lady Viking.”

NRL: “That’s the 3XL.”

Me: (long pause)

Me: “You just really get me.”

Gen Con Weddings!

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Hey folks! I’m doing a thing!

To help celebrate the 50th year of everyone’s favorite giant gaming convention, the Very Vocal Viking will be performing Weddings and Vow Renewals at Gen Con this year! There are individual ceremonies offers and I’ll be doing a very big and very fun mass wedding/vow renewal in the Union Station Grand Hall right before the Saturday night dance. Check out the link to read more about all the fun.

Very Vocal Viking presents: Gen Con 50 Weddings and Vow Renewals

Most of it will just be for fun, and I may possibly be dressed as a Viking, maybe even Hagrid. But, since I’m a licensed officiant in Indiana, I could possibly even have an actual wedding or two! You never know. Gen Con is a magical place.