Mr. ATM

I’ve reached that phase of fatherhood where I feel I’m half man, half ATM.

Risky

My Wonderful Wife: “I made the dinner, so you kids need to clean up the dishes.”

Little Miss Thing, age 5: “I can’t.”

Me: “And why not?”

LMT: “It’s bad for my self esteem.”

Me: “I think I’ll take that risk.”

PRO TIP: Toothpaste should NEVER be stored next to a tube of tuna flavored cat laxative.

So… How is your morning going?

Yes, this actually happened. Did not make into my mouth, though. Could have been worse.