(loud commotion)
Danger Monkey, age 9: “Hey, I didn’t say GO yet!”
My Oldest, age 15: “Life has no start or stop buttons. I’m preparing you for real life. You’re welcome.”
DM: “Well, I don’t like it.”
Oldest: “No one does.”
Me: “You are bitter beyond your years.”
Oldest: “Thank you.”
I’m at a mall to pick up my daughter.
The mall is filled with teenagers.
All the stores are staffed by teenagers, except their managers, who are college kids. The security guard is maybe 25.
I hate all the stores and the music and the layout. Who designed this parking lot, Stevie Wonder?
I am the only one here that has heard of Stevie Wonder.
Dammit.
I’m totally That Old Dude At The Mall.
I never wanted to be that dude.
I always hated that dude
Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft star that shines at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there; I did not die.
— Mary Elizabeth Frye
Very Vocal Viking 